Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter

So, I'm going to try my hand at some book reviews because...well, why the hell not. I read too damn much anyway, especially crap, so here's my take on the latest thing I read.

So you're probably asking yourself "Wait, this is a real book?" to which I answer "HELLS YES". Written by Seth Grahame-Smith, the writer of the famous "Pride and Prejudice and Zombies" (Also a real book), Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter follows our fearless 16th president and his war with the denizens of the night. NOTE: I would probably hate Grahame-Smith in real life, just for spelling his name that way. Just saying.

The book stays quite close to the events of Abraham Lincoln's real life with eerie accuracy, in which would basically be a very good biography of the president, assuming you ignored all the parts about vampires. That's kind of a huge part of the book though, not sure why you would ignore that. Literally EVERYTHING in the book ties into Lincoln's secret life as a vampire hunter. Even the Civil War and his disdain towards slavery are explained as ways to stamp out easy food supplies for vampires. 

A note about the vampires: Twilight fans can suck it, because these are true vampires. Blood thirsty, monstrous creatures, often portrayed in the book killing with abandon. They don't sparkle, they don't mope, and they are much more likely to tear off your arms and beat you to death with them rather than have little love stories with teenage girls. If you can't stand blood and gore, this isn't for you.

All in all, this is a fun book. The accuracy of the true parts of Abraham Lincoln's life add a level of authenticity that elevates the book from "trashy horror pulp", while adding a dark sense of humor and irony that is thoroughly enjoyable.

~Jones Out